The Fray - Absolute

Ive seen this one before, the girl she gets away
Everybody knows it but no one tries to stop it
Cause she barely even knows him but if she could see inside
Everything is quiet as she waits to tell him who she is

Is this all we get to be absolute

Quiet but Im sure there is something here
Tell me everything cause I want to hear

Its a kiss sits upon on her lips that waits for planes and battle ships
She wants to be a dancer and he has got a picture
On his wall and its a sailor in a new port every night
Yet man was born to trouble like sparks fly upwards innocent

Is this all we get to be absolute

Quiet but Im sure there is something here
Tell me everything cause I want to hear

All we are and all we want
40 years come and gone
All we are in photographs
Will never be taken

Quiet but Im sure there is something here
Tell me everything cause I want you here
Quiet but Im sure there is something here
Tell me everything cause I want to hear

I'm standing under a white flag
Friday, November 25, 2011

happy birthday sikai.
celebrating 6 years of friendship.

an apt song now would be 'The All American Rejects - Move Along'.
too apt.

im really gonna miss these people,
who turned my vj life from a nightmare to a safe haven.
even though probably none of them will appreciate me the way i do them.

but hey, who am i to complain.
at least vj life is almost finally gonna be over.

2 more MCQs to go, 1 more prom,and thats it.

since im half sober from rum rum raisin and tee i miss u,

and while im on a bus to no certain destination,
i shall evaluate my jc life.

i guess there are 4-5 main parts of jc life?

the first that happened to me was..
being ct rep of 10s3b.
honestly i now think that it wasnt a smart decision to have a change of style from secondary school to jc.

being thick skinned has its benefits definitely, but the disadvantages hurt more.

true, i was just impulsive during thw start of vj and wanted leadership roles so i just chionged.

apparently everyone was too shy to make a change then.
now there's too much, unwanted or socially inethical change.
and i guess im part of it, from their part of view.
oh well, that episode is over.

the next thing that followed closely was house cheer.
something that is probably ranked 1 or 2 in my jc life.
where people were genuine,
no restrictions,
or so it seems from now.
i guess it was the best in j1.

being pushed from a certain position in exco to vice pres led me to not gaining a leadership role in house comm.

could it have been a better choice if i was in house comm?
well, at least i know that ursa would have been a great bunch of people to work with.

not that anything's wrong with strings.
well there were certainly mistakes and errors that everyone made.
blunders.
and i do disagree with some now still.
especially the hate for K.
maybe its just me but i find he was just doing his job and there's really nothing much to hate when you're learning stuff from.

cmon, you dont hate someone who imparts you knowledge.
you may dislike the subject or topic, but in the end you really learn stuff right.
dont say you dont learn anything.
there are definitely lessons in every situation.
situations that you grow up and mature in.

and then that's probably my j1 life, some j2.

and then j2 i guess i can say that i've made a bunch of friends that are kinda ambiguous.
i would say that i feel close to them but they might not.
i guess its cause of this genuinity thing again.

i can say it out loud, i really hate acting.
acting kills your inner soul like a flame that wouldnt stop burning.
true, the outside life is full of actors.
true, we all got to act to survive the onslaught of bosses and superiors.

maybe if i try hard enough,
i could be my own boss and then i wouldnt have to listen to anybody.

violin maker's one of them.
studying music to be a performer, a teacher, a conductor..
or maybe even do sales for the lots of cash to pursue desires and interests.

so to these friends,
i really thank you for the wonderful experience that you guys have spared me,
and i sincerely apologise for any harm that i have caused to you guys.
sorry.
i still dont know how you guys think of me just crashing in like that.
but im not hoping for the best,
if i looked back at the situation i would have felt very awkward too.
or maybe even pissed.
my heart wouldnt have been big enough.

aand im taking the bus back home nao.
hougang is an interesting place to live in.

so jc life,
i've definitely gained some pointless knowledge from academics.
sad that i dont like studying till the very end.

but the most valuable asset i have obtained here is to really be who you are,
and that will determine what will be.
the roads will be tough and full of obstacles,
i guess it's in one's motivation, mindset, and (especially for me) important, signifcant friends and colleagues to encourage you.

life is tough,
escaping life in one way or another is a failure, including suicide.
i guess you really gotta Move Along and survive this onslaught.

im thankful for every teacher and tutor that taught me in this jc period,
i'll definitely miss them very much.

so to conclude this day of slacking in school in the rain,
skating/cycling,
lunch and origami at subway,
slacking,
udders and dinner,
'It is one of the many memorable periods of my life'.
aand im done and reached my bus stop.

on a mini note.
its your own taiji now.